Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Zach's Urban Experience

Here are two images from Zach's first photo-shoot. You will notice that there is a difference in the look and feel of each photograph. It is soft light in the mud & water. I used a #25 red filter for the photo in the direct sunlight.
We had a lot of fun walking around San Diego...also, you should have seen my shoes...there was about 3 inches of mud all around the edges. Zach is an 'Extreme Athlete', we will be filming him 90 feet in the air very soon.
Since tomorrow is Christmas, I'll wish a very Merry one to the readers of this blog. Zach's a good kid, I look forward to more artistic experiences with him.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Francis at 15

Francis will be 20 years old next year. He is the last remaining main character in my documentary film for me to do 'follow up' on. I'll be going to South Carolina to film him with his father, fishing out in the Atlantic. They are commercial fishermen. Francis is also a 'Surfer Kid'. When he came to San Diego in 2005 with his chaperon...he got to surf in the beautiful Pacific. He was very open with his body and then at age 15...saw his 'body as art'. In 2009 I'll photograph him as a young adult...documenting his matured body and probably get him on-camera with a girl, as he's somewhat a "chic magnet".

It should be a great experience....getting to film in his environment. Francis is more mature with regard to his view of the World. I look forward to interviewing him and letting him freely speak his mind.

Dusten is Art

Today is my's raining here in "Sunny" San Diego, California...well, it's usually sunny. I like the sound of the rain though. Just did my last photo-shoot of the year on Saturday. I'll post an image from that in about a week. The person in this photo is Dusten. I've photographed him since he was 18. He's 25...I believe that's this photo. Notice the scar on his left leg and hip. He and his brother were wrestling and his left femur 'snapped'. "Ouch"!! He's been amazing to photograph over the years...

Like many of the youths I photograph, he's not a "Model", except in front of my camera. With boys, their bodies mature and grow well into their 20's. You see more of a man's body at apx. the age of 25.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Cory is Art!

This is from back in June, July of 2006...when Cory spent part of the summer with me here in San Diego. I was his first photographer. It was an intense time, co-existing under the same roof. He is one of my closest friends and now a proud father of two little baby girls. He truly is one of "America's Finest Kids".

College Track Star

This is Sheldon, when I met him...he was an amazing athlete. Now, he's in the Army. He is indeed one of "America's Finest Kids".

The "Gay" Kid

His name is Brandon Spear, from Hollywood,CA
He is the cool "gay" kid in my documentary film.

America's Finest Kids

The Purest Form of Art

The purest form of artistic expression

is experienced through

-The fulfillment in the

activity of social service

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Cops in the Sky!

Cops in the Sky, that's a night, or morning or whatthefuckever! I'm still at LeStat's...accessing the "free" wifi. I've been emailing some "already famous" photographer friends have been saying I should be in, when we do the fucking search engine thing, then people will fucking start reading this Blog more. Well, as some of you know...I still do social services, elder care...the past few years.

It was killing me to work in juvenile group homes. There is all this shit in the news lately, the "16" yr old boy that was tortured in 'foster care' up in Tracy, California...there is so much more stuff that goes on. I tried fighting the "System" while working in fired, went to Court and WON! Got my back pay, but the thing's just like politics these days...all this shit just keeps on emitting its odor!

So, as very few people know, when I don't crash at Matt's house on my days off...I sleep in my car...last night there were drunks, skaters and their gf's...the Cop in the Sky was shining his light down about 2 am this morning...I was depressed, had a photo shoot cancel on me...I treat even the most 'green' model with bums me out when a shoot hardly ever happens though.

I thought about my life, for just a moment...the depression took me very low...thoughts of not existing, suicide...that shit going through my fucking brain...but, I finally fell to sleep. Yes, my life is a's not all 'fun and games', life is difficult to live...that's for sure.

It was cool to briefly talk with Cory in Pennsylvania again...he's now raising his two little daughters...his girlfriend split, what the fuck!...I love this kid!

Francis and I talked also last night...he and his Dad are going back out to fish, 4th time back to back...I look forward to getting out to see him next year in South Carolina to photograph and film him. He was 15 the last time I saw him...Oh', he told me to tell little Jed and his Mom hello last night...and I did. I was invited to the Christmas party at little Jed's was really cool. I brought him a new Skateboard magazine...he's almost 11 now, into skateboarding...

This morning I was pleased to get a call from Sean, he's one of the kids from Seattle that's in my film...however, he's sort of starving, living in Pittsburgh now. Fuck!!, everyone needs money! It would be so cool if I could show more of my photography online, but I'll pick something out to include in this blog.

You know, I love the cast in my documentary so much, I must finish this film for them...let the World see them and get to know them...

-If we die, do we make a ripple?

If we live, dose anyone with money care?

If we reach out to the homeless, the abused & used,

will money come our way?

The next Great American Photographer...or, so people say...

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

filming in Pennsylvania in 2007

Here's a production still from my visit to Pennsylvania last year to film Cory and his young family. Cory is one of the main characters in my documentary which is based on my photo essay on youth culture as art.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

health & foster care etc...

What an amazing 36 hours or so. I talked with my brother, he's going back to Oklahoma to try help out our folks. They are living on social security, Mom's health is failing fast and Dad has his own issues. They both may have to go into a nursing home...this sucks!

Part of my motivation to succeed as an Artist is to be in a place where money isn't so much of an issue. When I can, I'll bring them back out to California...rescue them from the 'prison' of the nursing home.

Yesterday, in the NEWS I heard about the 17 year old boy that was tortured and held captive in a 'Foster Home' in Tracy, California.

I'm also thinking about the 46 million of American's just like me that don't have and can't currently afford health insurance.

Also I'm thinking of the elder care I do as my work, (when I'm not working on my documentary film production)...

The man I lived with and took care of for 1 1/2 years,...he paid apx. $100,000 a year for 24/7 live-in home care... Oh' how I wish my folks could afford this kind of care...

Since the mid 80's I've worked in the juvenile justice system, and or mentored working in elder care...and trying to make it as an Artist.

You know, it costs over $100,000 a year to keep an adult in the prison system here in America.
How crazy is that, good people like my folks are left grovling for crumbs of assistance and we in this great country lock up an 18 year old that smokes too much pot...(same money...messed up deal)...

Well enough... name is Terry Smith and I approve this message!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

my photography

my photography is one, as of reading these blogs...and I have so much to show the World...

...what is...a great American photographer?


Monday, December 1, 2008


So, it is much, much more fun to be...LOVERS. This is one of many images from my photo essay on youth culture as art.
Note: this image was deleted by Censors on my myspace site...

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Photo Essay and Myspace...

This is an older image from my photo essay on youth culture as art. Chris is at his Grandparent's, in the pool house. Recently I've added over 200 photos to myspace. One was removed which had a guy-n-girl couple (clothed)....all sexy and fun, an image from my photo essay. It's funny and sad too, how myspace is all about making money, using young people and their need to communicate via the computer....They will cancel your account if someone, anyone's amazing. There are myspace groups for masterbaters, this, that, whatever...
It's an American thing. The myspace guy, "Tom"...he's in Santa Monica for crying out loud...BUT, he's all about exploitation and making money off of horny little teens that are searching for love or whatever through his M Y S P A C E "machine".....
You know it's a great asset, really...for communicating with friends, networking etc...but, it's America....don't fuck with the "Money-Mongers".... Advertise, Advertise Advertise!!!!!!!!!!
So much for Art, freedom of expression....and God forbid if you take on any established social norm or money making machines of our imperfect and celebrated society....


Last night I waited in line with all the other movie goers at the Landmark theater in Hillcrest....we were all waiting to see Gus Van Sant's new film, MILK.

It was such an amazing story, whether you are gay or's a very educational experience. It's important that we see films like this to teach us where we've come from and where we are going as a Nation.

Of course it's very sad how the story ends, it's a true story with a sad ending. I'm inspired to continue to strive to finish my own story, my film about my struggles as an Artist, with a camera and the relationships of the youths I've documented as art, for so many years....


Thursday, November 27, 2008

Keith is ART

This is another photo from our recent photo-shoot. That morning I woke up thinking about day 2 of our weekend filming and photography. 'Spider man' was what I thought, we did all of the fun and wacky poses...Keith was great!!

Keith's recent photo-shoot

Here's a pic from Keith's photo-shoot here in San Diego a few weeks ago....this is a part of his follow up story. I filmed and photographed him as he's 18 now....

Monday, November 24, 2008

my Mother

Cory is texting me...he's a good friend, will call me tonight. Well, I talked with my Sister back in Oklahoma a little while ago. Her oldest daughter is getting ready to go to work to her first job...she's a server at a nursing home. Sis and I had a good lil. chat before she had to go take care of her kids. My Mother is back in the hospital. Mom is asking for me....saying, "where's Terry". It breaks my folks have been one of the main reasons I've continued on with making this film, in hope that the sale of the documentar will net me enough money to be able to bring them back out here to southern California.....for there last days....Mom loves the ocean.

Hopefully I'll start hearing from people, I need to do the maximization thing to get traffic to my website etc....trouble is, I'm a fuckN broke ass Artist...currently.

Again, hopefully this'll happen sooner than later. You know, family is really the most important thing. So much craziness is going on in the world, we have clashes of cultures and ideals etc....really though, human life if the most valueable thing ever!!!

The whole world revolves in some way....shape....or form, around "relationships". Of course money makes the 'world go round'....but, it's really how we see the world through relationships that truly shapes 'our world'.

Are you a believer in karma?? Do unto others?? ....and I'm not talking vengeance.....we need more love..... Can we even love our enemies?? The problem is....our human race loves to hate, Wow!

I believe we should do our best to be kind and maybe I've just messed with your 'artistic mojo'....well, there are many aspects to our busy living.... I hope as my career takes off here in the very near future....that I don't lose my own 'humanity'....

Some day I will be worth a lot of money and many people will want to be with me in some way or another.....but, I don't ever want to forget where I came from....


Sunday, November 23, 2008

prejudice @ Target....and Skaters dissed!!

I'm here in San Diego, in my car, burning fossil fuel, running my AC, listening to U2 sing...."new years day"....

....watching Skaters, the one kid's board just broke....I gave the kid with open shirt, business card....told him about my documentary... I spoke with them as I was leaving the newly remodeled Target here on Balboa Ave. Some idiot in a high profile 4x4 tried to hit one of the Skaters as he was marking up the newly painted red curb with his board.... I talked with them about Washington Skate Park.....(built by Skaters)....

....but, what is fucking sad is.....(oh, by the way......Steven Seduction is texting me from Florida....I love this kid, he's so 'friggn' cool)....

...anyways, as I was leaving Target, I was looking my left a little African American boy, apx 6 or 7 years old was walking hand in hand with his White guardians (Parental units or whatever)........just talking, nothing weird or offensive....and then a 1/2 second later I heard an adult voice say, "fucking niggers"..... I looked up to see who it was an older bearded white guy with his wife......she was probably embarrased.... just kinda surprised me, you was sad to me. Maybe because, this little boy didn't do anything that I could tell to provoke this man to say such a thing....Oh well, just had to get online here in Target's parking lot, watch my new Skater friends....and burn more $1.95 a gallon gas and rock out to 94.9 and 91x.....
as soon as I figure out how to load up photos, I'll post some from Keith's photo shoot from last was amazing.

....more stuff is coming soon to

last night was a fun art event on Ray Street....with my friend Gustaf and the band was great...yadayadaya!!!

My photo exhibit in SouthPark is coming done next weekend at Junc if local, swing by and check it out. It was nice to get to the beach and get away from politics, starvation and world hunger and poverty for a few moments....

aint it all just so swell; met these boys from Italy....their broken english was refreshing!!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

hey everyone and whomever.....the site is up. We're still fixing stuff, more photos and videos will be up soon as well....

.....yes I'm watching the news, pirates, 8 year old kid killing his Dad etc..... yes, it's a fucked up W O R L D....

it's a pretty great place too!!!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

amazing photo-shoot

It was an amazing weekend, I photographed and filmed Keith.....he's now 18 so we did his 'follow up' story. It was in the 90' hot here in San Diego.

I filmed him skating throughout the urban settings in San Diego, also at the skate park.

He did his first nude shoot...he was so creative and we came up with incredibly unique poses. He is one of the main Characters in my documentary which is based on my photo essay on youth culture as art. Remember, please go to next week, it'll be online.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

thoughts of the day...

hey everyone,
hopefully will be ready to put online tomorrow. I'm so stoked about this new site and already looking forward to 2009. The plan is to be in NYC by end of summer....editing with Eric at American Montage.

Got news that my Mom is doing a little better. It's tough being an Artist, maintaining all these various relationships etc...

Some of the kids in the film are having tough time, legal stuff...too much partying etc... So much in life revolves around 'relationships'. I just talked with this kid in Temecula, he's probably going to play the drums in my documentary and we'll do a photo shoot as well. I think he can make as a fashion model....we'll see. I told him about Ryan I photographed him at age 13. Ten years later this kid is one of the most successful American male models.

So many kids want to have a career in front of the camera. Some have families with money, some don' many factors come into play....and life seems to throw you a few curve balls along the way. Well, hopefully I'll be hearing from some folks....asking about my photography and the documentary film on American youth culture....

Sean's visit to "America's Finest City"

This is Sean...we did a photo shoot in December of 07 in Seattle, Washington. This photo is from our shoot in March of 08, here in "America's Finest City".